ArabianOud {R}

I am hollow as this sea shell, so emotionally drained, I hold this sea shell in my hands and recall how I felt so lonely standing that day at the sea shore... Memories of loneliness haunt my soul... I scribbled my hand with our name but then I scribbled it away remembering how you alienated me so mercilessly.. how unworthy you were of my love... London 2005

We parted and you parted, and our hearts were not afflicted By yearning for you, nor did our eyes dry up. When our consciences confide in you, sorrow Would almost destroy us, if we did not find solace. Because we are missing you, our days have become Black, and our nights with you used to be white, Life was happy because of our companionship And the place of entertainment was serene from our mutual sincerity by Ibn Zaydun- Andalucian poet Image: by Big H

For the past few months my blogs have been very serious but now thanks to a few people, I am able to breathe back into my vibrant self. Well I wouldn't tell you their names but I would rather give them coded names: Abs - thanks man for your lovely messages even though you were so out of town and managed to keep in touch with me, I hope your trip to Hong Kong, Paris, Malaysia and Singapore went well, oh did you finally get to propose to that girl you love? ! Zaaz- your a nut cracker, your my energy booster, you watched my tears drop and then wiped them away, you were the one who said ' It's okay girl, I am here for you' In the coming time, Arabian Oud {R} is going to be updating stuff which is pretty vibrant, she's decided to pack bags of sorrow and replace it by joy, joy is that makes your heart pump faster, raise those blood vessels like a roller coaster ride.. pumpin up my blood and energy, I am turning bohemian again, I forgot how to dance to those techno music t...

Standing on the stage, I read my speech, I gaze into the eyes of all those people, Who once denied to acknowledge my talent, It took me ages to prove myself, Your discouraging me, you ain’t my friend, But beneath I knew, I had a long way to go, The road seemed vague, but I had hope, She kept stealing my ideas, he kept laughing, They kept becoming obstacles & diverting, But I paid no heed to their cruel intentions, Here I am, finally standing proud of myself, They kept hovering around me, making me feel special, He wants to be my man, she wants to be my best friend, Temptations all around me but I am not shaken, For the love of my beloved holds me back, For my heart isn’t excited by the passing by phase, For there is an end to every fame, And then I shall fade into anonymity in few years, Replaced by another ‘bright’ face, who is a heart throb, Fearless is how I feel, not bothered about my failure, For success has been achieved and failure has died out, Today my fame take’s those la...

CROSSING THE BORDERS Chapter 1 Introduction- ‘ Queer eyed pair’ It has always been of a great interest to the likes of Hessa Al Rumaithi, a mixed race girl, to help disabled people and the less fortunate wherever she travels, she is keen on helping these suppressed and oppressed individuals. At the age of 25, she is an outgoing, friendly and adventurous individual. Born in UAE, she has been traveling back and forth to Belgium, the UK and UAE. Just over six months ago, she graduated from one of the prestigious university in London; she completed her media studies degree. A passionate lover of travel, music, poetry, culture, theatre, adventure, photography and working towards charity, these are the different colours that form her personality. For every thread that constitutes Hessa, she is simply exceptional; she is a helpful and down to earth person, who takes criticism as praise. She spends time learning about different cultures and travels to explore how wonderful this world is. Despi...

Can you stop the music from playing tonight? And the people from gossiping that lie? Remove those camouflage get ups & come clean, Stop cheating and look into my eyes, You have afflicted my soul for long, Those moments of deceit aren't languishing, You have bruised every inch of my soul, You instilled fear in my bones, By turning so volatile & vile, Your sweet talk ain't impressing me anymore, You cast a spell on me & intoxicate my soul, It was a dream, I know you were never sincere, For the yearning to be with you long extinguished, Since I knew you loved me never, I burnt away all your love letters to ashes, I watch them extinguish & my tears can not save them, My creativity is no longer imprisoned to your kingdom, I finally escape to a new world & breathe afresh, No longer does your gaze melt my heart, For I locked away the door to my heart, And threw away the keys in the dark, So never shall I be afflicted by your memories. Image: me

Forgive me For I can’t be in your life no more, For I can’t live with you no more in this place I called home, For causing all this pain and giving you wounds And leaving you in the middle of the road, For not being your everlasting sunshine, For not being your moral support, For I can not be your dream no more, And I no longer can be your happiness, Forgive me...... For not playing with you in a garden of roses, For not being the moon you once desired, For not being your morning and night, Forgive my heart for falling in love with you, Forgive my eyes, for staring at your angelic face, I blame my heart, for its at fault for your damage, So forgive me all together O’ beloved, For coming in your life as a dark sky, I don’t know why this is happening, But I know I won’t ever be in love again, My eyes cry in silence and I drink my tears, Forgive me, for I ask thee for pardon. Woe unto me, Woe unto me, my heart moans Image Location: Hyde Park, London 2005

From Top-Down: A castle at Alton Towers theme park ( UK), On the way to France from Geneva, Swiss chalets ( houses) & Swiss mountains.

My eyes looked out of the window in silence, My body was overtaken by fears and pain, Patience kept falling out as time passed by, A non stop rush of words swept through, Words of love and care,Soon started to fade away, As I returned back to this sanctuary, Miseries and disappointments increased, A perfectionist was I, who was soon isolated, The terror of their words were that of swords, Cutting every inch of my senses, Till I finally gave up on life, Reminiscing those moments of joy, For this was history to my life, Suffocation over the chest and words freeze, My goodness was mistaken for selfishness, I sat down in the dark, trying to reconcile, But alas! every attempt became a failure, Leaving no choice but to extinguish, Shooting myself to nothingness, Slitting off the wrist and enduring infliction, Madness was my cure, and shadows my friends, Come to the gathering of lovers O' loners, There is no peace in giving yourself away, Love took me on a spiritual abode, Leaving behin...